Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Matheran-ey Mathahoron

Mota: kotokhkhon lagbe bolechili mac, du ghonta? Du ghonta to bara ei toy train-ei boshe jhuk jhuk korchi

Mac: o baba, tumi ki boro hoe gecho naki? Chuti katate esecho. Just chill.

Mota: tahole to gorur gaari kore elei hoto, aaro chill hoto, jaihok, okhane chilled beer paioa jaabe toh, songe gorom gorom mach bhaja

Mac: mach???!!! Ei bara, aager thekei bolechilam je mach , mangsho be na, shudhu dim…

Mota: Ghorar dim. Tumi bolechile dimer dalna hobei, aar anurodher ashor boshle, chicken o baniye debe, ekhon bolcho navratan korma

Dadu: Korma, aha, koddin aminiyar chicken korma khai ni...

Mac: aar khabeo na...eibaar theke thepla, dhokla aar ...aaar, ei maiti, tui to eto khabar tabaar niye likhish, kichu gujrati khabarer naam bol na....oi khete hobe

Jini: na re gujrati thali amar bhishon bhalo laage. Amar ek client shedin khaoalo...offf...ekta urban youth product...healthy filler...

Maiti: Gujrati thali?

Jini: na na amaar client-er product-ta…red bull type-er kintu ektu onyo bhabe amra korbo…

Jhuk jhuk jhukjhuk…

Cut to matheran-er pahar, intercuts with mac-er mukhe hashi…halka background score…tomar barir samne diye ei rail line jedin jaabe…dadu-r mukheo ekta halka hashi…thought bubble-e amitabh parveen bhabi ke bolche…gujrati ma bole, tani prem kari chu…chu…chu… aur bangalimein…

Pechon theke: bangali naki?

Ekjon 50 chui chui bhoddorlok mac-er dike proshno.

Mac: han- maane hindir haan aar banglar hae-r majhamajhi

Stranger: kolkata theke?

Mac: barrackpore.

Maiti: dur baal, kothaye thakish jiggesh korche, origin noe.

Mota: tahole to ekhankar odhikangsho lok-ke shei silet, chattogram, bolte hoe

Chumki: aar kichu lok toh aaro door-e yangon, myanmar eishob bolte hoe

Stranger: amar naam subhash gupta

Maiti: ( mukh chepe)baba, leg spinner naki

Mac: subhash gupta, maane aapni aage jwt…maane contract…

Dadu: Uni subhash ghoshal mac, aar uni mara gechen

Mac: o sorry

Stranger: na , ami ekjon photgrapher. Gach-paala, pakhi, eishober chobi tuli

Rahul ( etokhkhon chup kore cigarette kahcchhilo, gola nichu kore...) salim ali...

Mac: ki ali?

Dadu: laila ali, aha, kintu shedin porlam meyeta naki gay...tao cholbe...

Maiti: ekta ghushi khele na, ei aamir khan-er moto mukh puro rang de basanti hoe jaabe

Mota: ta ekhane ki chobi tulte na chutite, na dutoi.

Stranger: na, maane ekhane amar ekta baari ache. Shekhanei majhe modhye ashi. Besh nirjon prokritir kol-e boshe kota din katano ei aar ki.

Dadu: ei nin, ektu vodka cholbe naki

The starnger gladly accepts the thermocol cup from dadu

Jini: oh, great, eikhane ekta baari hole ja bhalo hoto na, nothing like it

Chumki: babu, edik odik bari kena baaje idea, cholo erokom kono ekta jaygaye bari kini

Mota: na na , maintenance-er onek jhamela…tar cheye hotel-I bhalo

Stranger: na, maintenance ta ekta problem bot-e kintu hotel-er songe barir tulono chole na, specially ei jayagye. Amar barita besh spacious, araam se dosh baro jon thaka jaaye

Mac: apnar barita kon dike. Amra woodlands-e..

Mota: amra woodlands bole ekta hotel-e thakbo bhabchilam, booking tooking nei, jani na ekhon giye kichu booking pabo kina...

Mac: duple...

Mota: ha, double bed peleo sekhane teen jon hoe jaabe...

Maiti: ekta michke hashi heshe- ha ha kichu ekta manage hoe jaabe...

Stranger: booking jokhon nei tokhon abbar woodlands jaben keno, amar baritei roe jaan, amader du tolaye 4 te bed room ache, tobe bathroom khali duto. Oi charte ghor-e apander 8 jon-er khub bhaloi hoe jaabe. Nicher aaro 4 te ghor.

Mota: baba 8 roomer. Thake ke sekhane

Stranger: emnite ekta marathi buro chakor ache. Tobe christmas-er din amar bhaiji aar tar teen bandhobi ekhane esheche chuti katate. Ei Pune-tei ora MBA pore…

Train-er whistle KUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUKUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Dadu: whsiteles to the tune of mere sapnon ki raani kab aayegi toh

Mac ekta boka hashi motar dike, je tomar miss hoe gelo guru

Maiti dubaar pant ta tene nilo

Rahul khub serious mukhe dhoya charte laglo

Jini r chumki-r mukhe ekta guys will be guys hashi…

Mac: coolie nibi naki

Mota: eta fokot-e beriye gele coolie ke bolbo kaandhe kore bombay niye fero…

Stranger: Ashun edike, ei minute paanchek hata poth…

Kromosho…

Ei golper mor kon dike ghurbe? Ei subhash Gupto-i ba kirokom lok, bhalo bangali photogrpaher na Abu salem-er songi. Dadur sapno ki raani ki ekhanei khuje paabe. Sekhane ki dadu-i man of the match hobe na maiti ba mac khel ghorabe. Barita bhuter baari noeto? Jaante hole likhun. Chot kore likhun...

166 comments:

Rahul Ghosh said...

Paanch minute-r haata poth. Theek achey. Jonogone hethey choleche. Furfure batash, pakhir daak, shobaikar monay notun uddom. Baad shaadhlo metaphor!

Metaphor...maane paanch minute-r hatha je metaphoric paanch minute...practically 15 hote paare, sheta keu bhebe dekheni. Tai jonogon-r furfure mejaaj gradually naamte laaglo.

First kaaman ta daaglo Dadu...

Dadu: Dur baara! Matheran-ey eschi. Amra ki Dandi march korte eschi naki? Kotodur aar?

Bhorsha peye...
Gini: Ei Rahul, ekta ghora dekhna! Amaar peeth-r byatha abaar...

Chumki: Ei stupid lokta kotodur haathabe?

Mota: Babu, crib korona! Dekho erokom pahari raastaye hatle amaader teen-din taichi korte hobena!

Rahul: Aha! Eto taratari bhenge porle cholbe. Bini poishaye thaakbe. Haatbeo na! Oto shohoje hoyena. Marathi chakor-fakor dhop. Ebaar dekhna, bari pouche bolche, barita ektu porishkar korenao. Kuo theke jol tuley nao. Peyaj-ta chariye nao.

Mac: Ar baki shob dhop hok nahok, oi Pune-r bhaiji ar tar teen bondhu jeno dhop na hoye. Na hole baara, loktake bolbo jekhan theke paaro meye dhore aano...

Dadu: Na na! Ta ki kore hoye? Bhaiji-r ashaye jachi, bhai! Sheshe bhaiji na hole baiji?

Subhash Gupta saamne saamne hatchilo. Kolahol shuney pechoney firey ekbar jiggesh korlo
Ki byapar? Haapiye gele naki?

Shonge shonge Mac mukh-r expression nimeshe change kore bollo

Mac: Na na...no problem...

tarpor bhodrolok-r kache giye ektu ashte ek kotha jiggesh korlo, jaate bakira na shunte paye.

Mac:...apnar barite Metrogil ache?

KROMOSHO

Rahul Ghosh said...

Jonogon haath-te haath-te ekta bhanga colonial-amoler bunglow-style bari samne eshey daaralo.

DARK WOODS VILLA.

Barita-ke jodi quaint bola hoye tahole that would be a window dressing. Metaphorical pun! Barita-ke jodi 'set in natural surroundings' bola hoye, read ashe pashe agacha-r jhaar.

Anyway barita ke dekhe group-r shobaikar different reactions holo.

Gini: Hmm...ekta mysterious byapar ache.

Chumki: I am sure baritaye bhut ache.

Maity: Ekhn na thaakleo kichukhn baadei ashbe...bhut-r naam Hojo. Acha Mr Gupta, ekhane ki running hot and cold water paowa jaabe?

Dadu: Uff...daarun romantic jayega monay hoche. Dhruti ke ekta sms kori!

Ei bole shey mobile-ey kut kut korte korte agachar jhar-r dikey chole gelo.

Pechoney roilo Mota, Mac ar Rahul. Ora ektu pechoney chilo, ekta cigarette-r dokaane dhowa stock korchilo.

Kichukhn baade eshey dekhlo je baki lokjon ekta poro barir samne daariye ache.

Mac: Ki? Ei bhange barita-r samne daariye keno? Chol...taratari pouchoi...

Gini ghure Mac ke bollo...
Sssh...etai Mr Gupta-r bari.

Mac: Leora!
Mota: Eta bari na hanabari?
Rahul: Jomey jaabe...

Kichukhn baade Dadu agachar jhar theke beriye bollo...
Dadu: Network paaowa jachena ekhane. Toh shei Pune-r bhaiji-ra kothaye?

KON DIKE MORE NITE CHOLECHE EI GOLPO? KI LUKIYE ACHE IN THE DARK WOODS? JAANTE GELE PORTE THAKUN AR LIKHTE THAKUN!

Anonymous said...

Kichhu hindi/english mein bolo.
-Gujjuben.

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